Monday, August 25, 2008

Is help on the way?

Something seems to be wrong. Seriously, i dont know what's happening to me, myself and i. Somehow, i really want to cry out loud, scream all i can and cry. I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday, causally talking, and after a while i said something. Being retarded, as you all know, i like to type stupid, retarded things. And well, i dont know if what i type was the thing that particular friend of mine was angry or upset about. I have no idea. She asked me to find out. Seriously, if i know what is it i would have said right. I sat there throughout the whole night thinking what have i done. Before that, i was talking to Cheryl, pouring out everything that i could. she was nice enough to comfort me, hearing all the nonsense that i was sprouting. She's sweet. And now, it became this, why, what have i done, throughout my 20 years of fucking retarded life. There is this strong urge inside me to just take a knife and slash myself. (stupid) *slaps myself. Times have been hard, there are more people out there who are 1000000000000000 times worse then me. I'll just be nice and donate my heart, kidney, bone marrow, skin, leg, hands, nose, whatsoever. Why are things coming towards me one by one. The first thought was that 'i can handle it' HAHAHA. Guess what i cant, this is so ridiculously dumb. i'm just dumb, naive, retarded (very), stupid everything. I dont know.

WHY CANT I OPEN MY EYES BIG ENOUGH TO SEE THINGS, PEOPLE. MAKING MYSELF SO HAPPY BUT I KNOW DEEP DOWN I FEEL SO SAD, SO DEPRESSED, EVERYTHING.

From now on, i am going to declare that CERTAIN GUYS ARE FUCKING, FUCKINGGGG, FUCKINGGG ASSHOLES. THEY SHOULD FUCK OFF AND DIE. SERIOUSLY. WHOEVER OUT THERE THAT WEAR THAT 2 TONE SKINNY JEANS ARE CB. WHATEVER. GU7YS ARE OFFICIALLY OUT OF MY LIST. BUTCHES ARE WELCOME. (HAHAH, Please dont laugh jy, LOL.

Ps: jon, js or whoever, you're still my close friends :)

WHATEVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I DONT GIVE A DAMN ANYMORE. NIGHTS

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